• The Intimology School

Myths about the Female Orgasm

Updated: Jun 29

Written by Dr Mafe Peraza Godoy


Orgasm is the penultimate phase of sexual response, prior to the refractory period, which in women is usually shorter than in men. It releases a series of very pleasant sensations, because of the tension accumulated during the erotic act. However, climax can be reached without proper genital intercourse. Researchers Odgen, Whipple and Komisaruk concluded that orgasms take place in the brain. They speak, therefore, of the pleasure generated "in the mind" due to a complex process of integration between received and perceived stimuli. Thus, one of the classic myths is erased: the compulsory practice of intercourse.


Is it easy for women to reach orgasm?


Today women are still perceived as passionate, willing and orgasmic. But even today, there are still many people who consider orgasm as the fundamental goal of any sexual encounter. However, reality is very different. For many years female sexuality was an unexplored field of study. It was an unknown area for specialists, and even for women themselves due to cultural reasons. Self-exploration of the body and the pursuit of pleasure had been practically taboo, so little knowledge was available on the subject. Many women still worry about never having reached climax thinking that they suffer from so-called anorgasmia. But the truth is that, unlike men, women must learn to achieve pleasure by their own hands. In fact, it has been proven in a reliable way that a considerable time usually elapses from the beginning of the sexual act until the attainment of pleasure. But the myths do not end here.

Different kinds of orgasms


Until recently it was believed that a woman could achieve two types of orgasm: The one produced by vaginal stimulation and he orgasm produced by clitoral stimulation. This axiom has ended today; that is, both forms reach the same type of orgasm. The orgasm is like a light bulb that is lit by many switches, but there is only one orgasm and it is managed in the brain.


Women are multi-orgasmic


Each woman experiences a different sexual response, some may feel small orgasms of little intensity. There are those who manage to reach a single orgasm and, finally, others reach several orgasms of high intensity. Female sexual response makes it easier for them, in comparison to men, to unleashed this repeated orgasm sensation in a single event; but not having them doesn’t mean anything. The best orgasm is the one that has been enjoyed.




The best orgasm is achieved with a partner


It truly is very difficult to reach climax at the same time as your partner. Each person has its own rhythm and presents a different response and sexual cycle, so the simultaneous orgasm seldom happens. We cannot insist on this happening. It just comes up. Surely you have grown up thinking that it is even a test of love...but no, it has nothing to do with love or being a good lover, it relates to times of arousal and sexual response, which are quite different for men and women. The ideal is to have synchrony, communication and to negotiate the times for the enjoyment of both.



The woman who doesn’t reach orgasm does not enjoy herself.


As we mentioned before, some women do not manage to reach orgasm or reach them with difficulty, but that does not mean that they do not feel pleasure or that they do not enjoy the game of sex. The problem arises when reaching an orgasm is set as a goal. This will cause the person to be blocked again and again, which won’t fail to generate constant frustration.


Having sex implies concentration, unlearning myths, attention to details and sensations produced, proper stimulation; better communication and surrendering to pleasure are the keys to enjoyment.

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School of Healthy Pleasure